I Still Hate Windows 8

Have I mentioned lately how much I hate Windows 8?  Well it’s time for a refresher.  I was just trying to sign a new contract with my publisher but I needed Adobe Acrobat Reader in order to access it.  The problem was I didn’t have that program installed on my computer.  Now I have learned a thing or two since my last rant and knew to go to the Charms bar and type in Adobe Acrobat Reader.  Sure enough it comes pre-loaded on my computer.  It was Version 5.  So I installed it.  As soon as I went to use it I received a message that said “Version not compatible with your system.”  Then why did they load it on in the first place?  I followed a link on it to their help site that promised chat support if I could just answer a few questions.  After answering several questions I was sent to the forum.  There were over 23,000 questions about problems with Windows 8.  I scanned them for about 10 minutes and then gave up on that idea.  After trying several different ways to get to the chat screen so a human could talk me through this I ended up time and again in the forum.  I guess as Rick Myers used to say on the “Saturday Night Live” skit “Coffee Talk”, Adobe’s answer to every problem is to “Talk amongst yourselves.”  After closing the web I uninstalled the useless Adobe program and returned to my magic Charms bar on Windows 8 and searched again.  There was a download for a free version of Adobe 11.  Now we were getting somewhere.  I went to the page and it said it was for Windows 8 and it was not Trial Ware.  (If you don’t know what that is, it’s like a great first date with a woman and then you find out she’s a prostitute!)  So I downloaded it.  Suddenly my antivirus found a threat…then another, and another, and so on and so on until I had 6 virus threats flashing and the download was telling me my computer had errors and if I clicked the button to continue, it could fix them.  That was the only way to finish the download.  Well I wasn’t falling for that.  I closed the window and exited the download.  Then I pulled up the internet to try Adobe the old fashioned way.  Instead of my home page coming up, a blank one did.  Blankidy blank blank!  Then the virus warnings started flashing again.  I went to my control menu and deleted everything I had downloaded today and then called my antivirus people.  2 hours later they said they had removed all the infected files and asked what had happened.  I told him and he was nice enough to (while he had control of my computer) go to the Adobe website and download what I pray is the appropriate software.  I tried it the Windows 8 way and I totally ended up with a raw deal.  A good friend of mine had suggested that I try downgrading to Windows 7 but I hear Windows 9 is on the way and it is very similar to Windows 8.  I would be further left behind if I regressed now.  So here I sit with my Windows 8 like the cat you paid too much for and is hissing and scratching at you all the time.  You can’t get rid of it.  You just have to try to deal with it as best you can.  So if you didn’t get my point here, let me reiterate…I HATE WINDOWS 8!  And I’m not too happy with Adobe right now either.